[Sarah MacLean] read online Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake epub

  • Mass Market Paperback
  • 397
  • Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake
  • Sarah MacLean
  • English
  • 08 September 2018
  • 9780061852053

Sarah MacLean ´ 7 Download

Free download Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake review ã eBook, PDF or Kindle ePUB ´ Sarah MacLean Sarah MacLean ´ 7 Download Atisfied And so she's vowed to break the rules and live the life of pleasure she's been missingBut to dance every dance to steal a midnight kiss to do those things Callie will need a willing partner Someone who knows everything about rule breaking Someone like Gabriel St. 5 stars Historical RomanceWhat a wonderful charming sexy entertaining sweet funny emotional steamy and well written regency romance with an utterly lovable uirky plump Plain Jane wallflower spinster heroine and a sexy as sin tarnished heart of gold rogue hero to die forNine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake is a truly delightful read with everything I love in a historical romance an engaging story witty dialogue humor drama emotion smokin hot love scenes an endearing heroine and a deliciously sexy rake hero reformed by loveSarah MacLean has earned a place on my author auto buy list and I can t wait for Nick s story Ten Ways to Be Adored When Landing a Lord to come out Big 5 stars

review ã eBook, PDF or Kindle ePUB ´ Sarah MacLeanNine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake

Free download Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake review ã eBook, PDF or Kindle ePUB ´ Sarah MacLean Sarah MacLean ´ 7 Download A lady does not smoke cheroot She does not ride astride She does not fence or attend duels She does not fire a pistol and she never gambles at a gentlemen's clubLady Calpurnia Hartwell has always followed the rules rules that have left her unmarried and than a little uns. There once was a plain and plumpish blubbery waste of space girl with tons of money called Calpurnia who never got married even though she had some suitors We re told she s a pragmatic girl who has dreams of marriage house home and children but she s turned everyone away because they re not the same as that handsome guy she once talked to for a couple minutes a decade ago about how her uaintly Classical name isn t really cause for eternal shame and contemplated suicideSo in the meantime she s beaten herself up emotionally about how she ll die the same fat and lonely sow she s always been Occasionally she faps to Homer and his romance of Odysseus and Penelope but then feels ashamed that a megaton heifer like herself should even entertain such thoughts Because as she is entirely all too aware pretty babies abort when a plain girl even considers sipping from one of theseBut then one day after she s been reminded by herself and others once too often that she s a dusty loser of the Youth Beauty and Happiness Game she decides to Fuck That Shit and makes a list of racy and scandalous stuff to do because who cares what an obese and homely water buffalo like herself does anyway She s going to pick herself up and fly free dammitSo one night drunk on sherry she arrives at the house of her decade old object of pathetic pining with the intent of getting a kiss from him Of course he soon has those Inexplicable Feelings for the hefty cow with the massive milk bags and is Fiercely Protective of her to his sudden bewilderment and confusionBut now that they re in closer uarters because his Italian half sister future series heroine needs a Professor Higgins to make her presentable in Society this most notorious rake in London blah blah blah lame cliche and Two Ton Annie will discover that what they ve been looking for all along is each otherI didn t get far Page 150 Such self abuse is biblically abhorrent and I felt lightning starting to crackle around me so I bailed But from what I did read it was every Regency romance cliche packed into one book Marriage wager Making out in a carriage I tried to read this because of the raves but there was absolutely nothing in it that I haven t read in books like this before There was the ugly duckling heroine who eventually becomes a swan paired with the bad ass rake who is really a slightly risue playboy with media savvy Blah The heroine was really ridiculous the heaps of abuse she put on herself and got from others such a blatant attempt by the author to get me behind herIt gets than a little wearying to read a heroine who has the attitude ofwhen my attitude isIf these are the awesome romances of today penned by Ivy League educated authors then I m going to stick with the trashy rapefests of the 70s and 80s by Midwestern housewives thankee very much

Free download Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake

Free download Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake review ã eBook, PDF or Kindle ePUB ´ Sarah MacLean Sarah MacLean ´ 7 Download John the Maruess of Ralston charming and devastatingly handsome his wicked reputation matched only by his sinful smileIf she's not careful she'll break the most important rule of all the one that says that pleasure seekers should never fall hopelessly desperately in lov. Nine Rules to Follow When Writing a Regency Romance1 Read Georgette Heyer This one is self evident If it s not read this2 Spinster on the shelf Make sure your heroine is never the belle of the ball Young vibrant beautiful ladies are of course infinitely less interesting than pale passive middle aged women who somehow mysteriously retain the fresh bloom of youth and the ability to attract rich handsome men who are being desperately pursued by 17 and 18 year olds Right3 The handsome titled rake Your hero cannot be a man of moderate tastes and self control Where s the fun in that Be sure to create a handsome irresistible man whore who has bedded hundreds of women and is in all probability suffering from a severe case of syphilis But the title of course will subsidise a multitude of sins uel amour4 Using Cant You have to gammon your readers with some fustian about a bluestocking who turns into a diamond of the first water and sets her cap at a Corinthian resulting in some cork brained adventures But it s still okay to use apologize instead of apologise realize instead of realise and so on we re sure the Americans learnt these misspellings from the Brits 5 Hoyden ish behaviour Despite being brought up in a society renowned for the rigidity of its rules and s make sure your heroine almost never wears a corset rides astride wears men s clothes freely uses swear words such as damn and somehow still fails to incur the attention or wrath of society6 A makeover The spinster on the shelf must always get an opportunity to re invent herself and dazzle all comers For this purpose you will need 1 a French modiste 2 a stunning gown 3 feminine lingerie 4 a devoted abigail with magic hands and 5 a beautiful face and lush figure that have so far been hidden under dowdy clothes for some unknown reason 7 A Special Ball If it didn t happen in a ballroom it ain t worth talking about All major scenes but ESPECIALLY the makeover must be accompanied by a ball Preferably the Season s biggest one Said ball must be rife with passion drama and of course the waltz Who gives a shit about the uadrilles and the country dances bring on the cabaret waltz8 The Big Misunderstanding The path of true love is never smooth Huh what did you think this was real life Can t have no Happily Ever After without the Big Misunderstanding Generally the BM involves a wager of some sort What else do these gambling rakes have to do apart from waste their blunt wagering on their women Alternatively it could involve abduction by the evil dandy but it s fun to see the hero and heroine make an ass of themselves No not arse darling ASS9 And last but most importantly EXHIBITIONIST SEX For some reason it appears almost mandatory in Regency romances for the hero and heroine to have sex or almost sex in places where it would be easy for other members of the public to walk in on them Like an unlocked fencing room in a men s club Or a garden adjoining a ballroom Or an alcove in a museum Or of course the ubiuitous carriage It s like nobody in Regency England s ever heard of a bed Also Regency romances are the perfect illustration of Big Stick in Little Hole syndrome since the heroine is always a virgin the man is always well hung and yet the first time they have sex is magical with only some minor fast vanishing pain Obviously practice makes perfect doesn t apply to Regency sex Epilogue I actually liked this book it was funny in parts did not read like bad Georgette Heyer fan fiction and even the sex scene was a little goose bump inducing the first time After that well jeez I know how it s done skip it already There was a big discussion going on over at Jillian s review about the actual romance uotient of graphic sex scenes so I m not going to get on that soapbox here I ve had a love hate relationship with historical romances for a while now but I m pleased to report that Nine Rules falls on the like side of the scale if you re a fan of historical romances I would recommend you put this on the top of your list